Prando's Asset Management - Merry Christmas*

The chairman offers his qualified seasonal greetings

Julian Marr
clock • 4 min read

Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year*

* Important information: The merriness of your Christmas and the happiness of your new year can go down as well as up and you may not get back what you put into them. Past Christmasses and new years are not reliable indicators of future ones. Celebrating Christmas and the New Year involves risk and may lead to loss of, among other things, temper, memory and will-to-live.

This seasonal greeting is only for use by intended recipients, eligible counterparties and people who believe in Father Christmas. It is not aimed at, or for use by, compliance types or anyone who would not know something that at this time of year might just pass for humour even if it came up to them wearing a festive jumper adorned with flashing fairy-lights and the words "I am something that at this time of year might just pass for humour".

This seasonal greeting should not constitute a substantial proportion of a recipient's total portfolio of Christmas cards and presents - that would be just too, too sad - and it may not be appropriate for all recipients. Recipients' attention is drawn to the specific messages set out in A Christmas Carol, The Grinch who stole Christmas and the Gospel according to St Luke - even if they are all, in our opinion, woefully under-complied.

This seasonal greeting is not necessarily a complete seasonal greeting and is not intended, for example, to wish you a Happy Easter. It has been prepared from sources believed reliable but is not guaranteed in any way by Prandeamus Asset Management (‘Prando's'). This seasonal greeting is subject to change at any time and should not be construed as seasonal, a greeting or indeed anything you should remotely rely upon.

In fact, if we are being honest, it is a source of constant wonder you might consider relying upon any material emanating from Prando's since we never seem to take any responsibility for any of it. Actually, if we are being honest, we are not even that happy about the earlier Father Christmas reference since we have no definitive source for his existence. Or, we should quickly add, kids, his non-existence.

Prando's is not responsible and takes no liability for the onward transmission of this seasonal greeting. It is not intended for any person or use that would be contrary to local law. It does not constitute a seasonal greeting by anyone in any jurisdiction in which such a seasonal greeting is not lawful or in which the person offering such a seasonal greeting is not qualified to do so or to anyone to whom it is unlawful to offer such a seasonal greeting.

No - we have no idea what that last bit really means either but we actually read something very similar from another compliance team once and so we are including it too - just to be on the safe side. Anyway, you can never have too much compliance, can you? Issued by the Chairman, who is not a real person, of Prando's, which is not a real company. The sentiments of the principal sentence, however, very much are.

Have you tried Professional Adviser's 2016 Christmas Quiz yet? The chairman has blagged prizes for the first three correct (or most correct) entries drawn out of his metaphorical hat at noon on 5 January 2017. Two will receive signed copies of his friend Paul Mumford's insightful blend of personal and professional experience The Stockpicker, while the third will receive a signed copy but with a £20 Amazon voucher inside.

The chairman isn't too bothered - you can use the voucher towards the Christmas present you hinted you really wanted but nobody gave you or, if it risks breaching your compliance code, as a bookmark. He is however keen that, to enter, you email him your name at [email protected] with ‘Prando's Christmas Quiz' in the subject line. Professional Adviser's normal terms and conditions apply - with one important addition …

You may think you know the right answers to our questions - indeed you may actually know the right answers to our questions - but should any of your answers happen to be different from the ones we print at the start of next month then, for the purposes of this quiz, they are not right. In other words, the chairman and the editor are most insistent their decision is final. Let's just hope it ends up being the same decision.

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